jalawson
Senior Member
I have noticed that as my married life once again progresses, my wife often does not have the same reaction to certain situations that I may have. I often find her responses unexpected and differing from mine. For example:
1. Honey, I just found these boss jean shorts in the storage unit. I used to LOVE these back in the early 90s. Don't they look cool?
2. Baby, hold on to your seat. You're not going to believe this! Animal Planet is running an all day marathon of River Monsters this Saturday!
3. Sweety, I bought us a bass boat!
4. Today's special had banana pudding AND pie on the menu! I couldn't decide on which one so I had them both!
5. Guess what? I'm three hours late because I found this terrific new fishing spot. This will give you even more time to get to know my kids.
6. You'd be proud of me. Instead of buying that mini van we were looking at, I scored us a sweet deal on this classic Triumph. The guy's even towing it over here for us now!
7. That's right! For your birthday, I got you the new Abu Garcia Revo SX on a 7.5 foot G. Loomis medium heavy. It's the same color as the vacuum cleaner I got you for our anniversary! They match!
8. Good morning! Good news! We caught a ton of fish last night. They kept biting until just a while ago. I left them in the cooler for you to clean while I catch up on some zzzs.
9. Honey, drop what you're doing, all fishing gear at Academy Sports is 10% off today!
10. Check this out! This girl I used to date after high school still works at Hooters. I just accepted her friend request.
OK., so not all of these happened in MY marriage. But you get the drift. The blue jeans shorts story is true. In fact, I set off on a fishing trip this weekend with my fashion conscious homies to prove that the blue jean shorts were still fashionably acceptable and could even bring us luck. Nathan is my most fashionable child. He has set fashion fishwear trends all over the South and continues to be on the cutting edge of fishing fashion.
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
Not to be outdone are Jackson and his friend.
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
Bass stalkers. Unfortunately, we were visited by only one small bass yesterday evening. We weren't skunked, but we didn't exactly set the lake on fire either. Nathan and I did visit an osprey and her newborn nesting on a pole in the middle of the lake.
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
All in all, it was a great trip; just no big fish and no numbers. My credibility as an advocate for the return of blue jean shorts to the fashion world had taken a serious blow.
Undaunted, I donned the same pair of jean shorts this morning to hit the farm pond early before work. As I left to take the kids to school, Jackson even pointed out to my new wife that I was wearing the shorts again. "I noticed", she muttered. Then, ever so softly, I thought I heard the word "NERD" come out of her mouth.
NERD! How dare she! That was it! I didn't spend four years in the high school band playing trombone to have my own wife call me a ner.....wait a minute....I better use another analogy. I didn't spend hundreds of dollars on fishing gear and don my new favorite pair of lucky jean shorts to be called a nerd! I stormed out of the house with my shorts firmly attached to my lower half. I would prove that these were lucky shorts and re-establish blue jean shorts as a fashion statement for all fishermen scared to put on their favorite pair of shorts for fear of ridicule by their significant others....and the rest of society. (Allen raises his fist and bows his head ala John Carlos during the 1968 Olympics "black power salute")
Well....Well....Well....Who's laughing now Ms. New York fashion queen that I married?
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
So gentleman. Do not throw away that underwear. Find that stinky old sweatshirt or t-shirt that your wife has hidden. Proudly place those old pair of gym shorts back in your dresser next to the bell bottom jeans. I have officially opened the fashion door for us all!
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
As always, my hair remained outstanding.
1. Honey, I just found these boss jean shorts in the storage unit. I used to LOVE these back in the early 90s. Don't they look cool?
2. Baby, hold on to your seat. You're not going to believe this! Animal Planet is running an all day marathon of River Monsters this Saturday!
3. Sweety, I bought us a bass boat!
4. Today's special had banana pudding AND pie on the menu! I couldn't decide on which one so I had them both!
5. Guess what? I'm three hours late because I found this terrific new fishing spot. This will give you even more time to get to know my kids.
6. You'd be proud of me. Instead of buying that mini van we were looking at, I scored us a sweet deal on this classic Triumph. The guy's even towing it over here for us now!
7. That's right! For your birthday, I got you the new Abu Garcia Revo SX on a 7.5 foot G. Loomis medium heavy. It's the same color as the vacuum cleaner I got you for our anniversary! They match!
8. Good morning! Good news! We caught a ton of fish last night. They kept biting until just a while ago. I left them in the cooler for you to clean while I catch up on some zzzs.
9. Honey, drop what you're doing, all fishing gear at Academy Sports is 10% off today!
10. Check this out! This girl I used to date after high school still works at Hooters. I just accepted her friend request.
OK., so not all of these happened in MY marriage. But you get the drift. The blue jeans shorts story is true. In fact, I set off on a fishing trip this weekend with my fashion conscious homies to prove that the blue jean shorts were still fashionably acceptable and could even bring us luck. Nathan is my most fashionable child. He has set fashion fishwear trends all over the South and continues to be on the cutting edge of fishing fashion.
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
Not to be outdone are Jackson and his friend.
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
Bass stalkers. Unfortunately, we were visited by only one small bass yesterday evening. We weren't skunked, but we didn't exactly set the lake on fire either. Nathan and I did visit an osprey and her newborn nesting on a pole in the middle of the lake.
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
All in all, it was a great trip; just no big fish and no numbers. My credibility as an advocate for the return of blue jean shorts to the fashion world had taken a serious blow.
Undaunted, I donned the same pair of jean shorts this morning to hit the farm pond early before work. As I left to take the kids to school, Jackson even pointed out to my new wife that I was wearing the shorts again. "I noticed", she muttered. Then, ever so softly, I thought I heard the word "NERD" come out of her mouth.
NERD! How dare she! That was it! I didn't spend four years in the high school band playing trombone to have my own wife call me a ner.....wait a minute....I better use another analogy. I didn't spend hundreds of dollars on fishing gear and don my new favorite pair of lucky jean shorts to be called a nerd! I stormed out of the house with my shorts firmly attached to my lower half. I would prove that these were lucky shorts and re-establish blue jean shorts as a fashion statement for all fishermen scared to put on their favorite pair of shorts for fear of ridicule by their significant others....and the rest of society. (Allen raises his fist and bows his head ala John Carlos during the 1968 Olympics "black power salute")
Well....Well....Well....Who's laughing now Ms. New York fashion queen that I married?
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
So gentleman. Do not throw away that underwear. Find that stinky old sweatshirt or t-shirt that your wife has hidden. Proudly place those old pair of gym shorts back in your dresser next to the bell bottom jeans. I have officially opened the fashion door for us all!
<table style="width:auto;"><tr><td></td></tr><tr><td style="font-family:arial,sans-serif; font-size:11px; text-align:right">From My Wife's Favorite Shorts</td></tr></table>
As always, my hair remained outstanding.
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