jeeptastic
Gone but not forgotten
My husband posted this story. I just wanted everyone to know that on Aug 22, 2009 he went to be with the Lord. It was a very peaceful death. I dont understand why God didnt heal him and allow him to stay here with me and his son. I just have to trust the Lord each day and live by faith. Ian was the love of my life and he told me everyday that he loved me with his whole heart. I have the honor of raising his son and I will remember him everyday. Please keep us in your prayers as I need them desperately.
My Cancer Story
I am not sure why I am even writing this. I don’t know if it is for closure in my heart, hopefully not closure in my life. I want to start by saying I have full faith that God will heal me, He promises it in the Bible.
Here is a little background about my self. I am 33 years old. 2 college degrees, had a successful job, was pretty content in life I guess. I love to hunt whitetail, like 3-4 days a week if I could. My wife didn’t mind she was always doing her own thing.
I guess around December we started having some trouble after 5 years of marriage. I thought a baby would fix everything, so at the middle of February we found out we were pregnant. Well guess what, things didn’t get better, I drifted farther apart because of a worse reason, which I would like to not discuss. The summer went by, things got worse and our beautiful baby boy was born in October.
On Thanksgiving Day my wife and I had had a huge fight and I pack a bag, I was through and just couldn’t take anymore. That night her parents showed up saw my bag and I left.
It was the hardest thing do to leave my 1 month old son behind, but I was trying to make a point. At that time I didn’t know it but I was in the biggest spiritual struggle of my life.
I stayed gone for month, we started divorce hearing and I got supervised visits. Which was better than nothing.
After I moved out I bought RockBand 2 to occupy my time. I played drums in high school and thought it would be fun. Well, I ended up playing this game every night for hours. I developed a cramp in my right calf from the bass drum peddle. I would be at work and people would be laughing because I couldn’t walk right, it was painful.
Then I started getting the sniffles and out of breathe, so I went to the doctor when He treated me for Bronchitis. That weekend I drove to Florida for my sisters wedding, had fun played around, danced some but I was always out of breath, I attributed it to the Bronchitis.
When I got back to work Monday was fine, But Tuesday I had a coughing fit and I couldn’t stop. I told my boss I was going home and I left. I went home and slept for 6 hours. I went to the Dr. again that night, again, Bronchitis, he changed some medications, I went to work on Thursday, but I couldn’t even make it to the top of the stairs with out of being out of breath, I would have to wait a minute and catch it, not good.
Well on Friday morning a got dressed for work, walked down to feed my dog was, but when I came up from watering him, I got into my truck (barely) started and passed out. I don’t know how long I was out but when I came to I was pouring sweat from every where, and I know that wasn’t right. Well, if you call 911 from where I would take them 20 minutes. I could be at work in 10. So I chanced it, I drove slowly and when I got to work the nurse walked right in front of me. She rushed over as I fell out of the truck and my boss walked over and they rushed me to the emergency room.
They did a chest x-ray, thought it might be pneumonia. Then they did a CT scan. That s when the Dr. burst in the door and said we are life flighting you to Emory, I said for pneumonia?
He said I had something call a saddle bad pulmonary embili. Well the weather was too bad for the helicopter so the took me in a very fast ambulance. When I got there I was rushed to ICU.
They did more chest x-rays and monitored me, since it was late Friday night. On Monday I had a PET scan. This is where they inject you with radioactive glucose which runs through your veins. Well that narrowed it down to my liver, but they didn’t think that is where it started.
So on Tuesday I got a liver biopsy. This is where they use a CT machine to guide a big needle into you liver to draw out samples. Then when you go to recovery you have to lay on you left side for 2 hours and every breath feels like a knife being stuck in you back and the you flip and feel the knife on the other side for 2 hours.
At this point a group of doctors come in and they tell you they ran smears and test and if any of them lit up it is cancer. I said, ”Let me guess, mine looked like a Christmas tree!” They laughed and said I had Stage 4 Small Bowel and Liver Cancer.
So they moved me to a regular room where I awaited on what they were going to, see there are only 5000 cases of small intestine cancer a year and they are in men over 55, I am 33.
Well after 2 weeks of sitting there something finally happed. Everything I ate started coming back up. So I put my self on a liquid diet and the scheduled an endoscopy for the next day. Now this is fun. The put you half to sleep, prop you mouth open and stick this long tube with a camera and probe down your throat. They got down there just past my stomach and found a tumor. So they took a biopsy. I had an orange sized tumor blocking my small intestine.
I was scheduled for surgery 2 days later. Everything went well and recovery was fine with help from morphine. Surgery was on Wednesday and I had a few visitors, but on Saturday something bad happened. Something I have never expected. I started burping this weird taste and then all of the sudden I vomited a bucket full on stomach bile. My mother was running out of the room so fast. Even some of the nurses couldn’t handle it.
Now if you have never seen stomach vile and I hope you don’t. It is black as tar and makes road kill smell like the best perfume in the world. I had had the stuff pouring out my mouth and my nose, it was bad.
I had to have a port put in my chest so they could administer chemo easier, didn’t even feel that.
They started me off on some pretty hard chemo (which I guess it is all hard) I was going every 3 weeks, the taking 8 pills a day (horse pills) 4 in the morning and 4 at night and then got a week off. The weird thing about the chemo was for the first 10 days of so after chemo you couldn’t touch or drink anything cold. You couldn’t stick your hand in the fridge or freezer with out gloves on or it felt like be stabbed. I was terrible, imagine going all summer not being able to drink cold sweet tea, torture.
Then something starting up with my bile duct, I don’t know if it was that chemo was to strong or what. So now I had to have a procedure called an ERCP. This is where they go down through your throat and put stints in to stretch the ducts. Well the first one didn’t work, go they tried a metal one, it didn’t work.
The next step was to insert biliary tubes. This is where they stick a 2 foot long blue tube with holes in it that will drain the bile from you liver and small intestines in to bags that you get to carry around. This is not a fun procedure at lease it wasn’t for me. They had to go right through on of my tumors, no amount of pain medication could stop that
You have to flush you tubes 3 times a day, no problem. But they also for get to tell you that they get clogged all the time making you go down there and sit in a waiting room to get it fixed, if it falls out, in which you are to go to the ER, where they do absolutely nothing for you.
Currently I have 3 tubes. I had my last chemo 2 weeks a go, I have vomited 11 out of 13 days due to who know why. I have the constant taste of Gatorade and Powerade in my mouth.
There are a few people out there who know who I am because I live in a small town, and I ask you out of the respect and courtesy of my family you don’t mention ANYONES! name. I will not hesitate to have this thread deleted.
I wanted to write this so that if there is anyone out there with cancer, I kinda know what you are going through, they are all different. If you have had cancer, do you have any hints or suggestions?
And just to let you know what cancer can do to, I am 6’3” (at one time 270, slimed down to 250) now I weight 175 lbs, have no muscles, not even enough to play with my son on the floor. Also for the fear he will pull out one of my tubes, so everyday gets harder and harder.
Please pray for me my wife and my 9 month old son. Thanks
GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
The one thing I left out of the original post was how awesome my wife has been. She is literally raising 2 children at once. She does everything. Down to my pills to flushing my tubes everyday.
I had a Dr.s appointment yesterday and got some bad news. I have an obstruction in my small intestine. I had an idea of this but never said anything. I had 3 choices. Have an endoscopy with biopsy, if it is cancer there was nothing they could do, if it was scare tissue they wanted to suck all the bile out of my stomach for 3 days and and i couldn't eat or drink for 3 days (torture), so I chose hospice. I have ended treatments and start hospice this week.
GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My Cancer Story
I am not sure why I am even writing this. I don’t know if it is for closure in my heart, hopefully not closure in my life. I want to start by saying I have full faith that God will heal me, He promises it in the Bible.
Here is a little background about my self. I am 33 years old. 2 college degrees, had a successful job, was pretty content in life I guess. I love to hunt whitetail, like 3-4 days a week if I could. My wife didn’t mind she was always doing her own thing.
I guess around December we started having some trouble after 5 years of marriage. I thought a baby would fix everything, so at the middle of February we found out we were pregnant. Well guess what, things didn’t get better, I drifted farther apart because of a worse reason, which I would like to not discuss. The summer went by, things got worse and our beautiful baby boy was born in October.
On Thanksgiving Day my wife and I had had a huge fight and I pack a bag, I was through and just couldn’t take anymore. That night her parents showed up saw my bag and I left.
It was the hardest thing do to leave my 1 month old son behind, but I was trying to make a point. At that time I didn’t know it but I was in the biggest spiritual struggle of my life.
I stayed gone for month, we started divorce hearing and I got supervised visits. Which was better than nothing.
After I moved out I bought RockBand 2 to occupy my time. I played drums in high school and thought it would be fun. Well, I ended up playing this game every night for hours. I developed a cramp in my right calf from the bass drum peddle. I would be at work and people would be laughing because I couldn’t walk right, it was painful.
Then I started getting the sniffles and out of breathe, so I went to the doctor when He treated me for Bronchitis. That weekend I drove to Florida for my sisters wedding, had fun played around, danced some but I was always out of breath, I attributed it to the Bronchitis.
When I got back to work Monday was fine, But Tuesday I had a coughing fit and I couldn’t stop. I told my boss I was going home and I left. I went home and slept for 6 hours. I went to the Dr. again that night, again, Bronchitis, he changed some medications, I went to work on Thursday, but I couldn’t even make it to the top of the stairs with out of being out of breath, I would have to wait a minute and catch it, not good.
Well on Friday morning a got dressed for work, walked down to feed my dog was, but when I came up from watering him, I got into my truck (barely) started and passed out. I don’t know how long I was out but when I came to I was pouring sweat from every where, and I know that wasn’t right. Well, if you call 911 from where I would take them 20 minutes. I could be at work in 10. So I chanced it, I drove slowly and when I got to work the nurse walked right in front of me. She rushed over as I fell out of the truck and my boss walked over and they rushed me to the emergency room.
They did a chest x-ray, thought it might be pneumonia. Then they did a CT scan. That s when the Dr. burst in the door and said we are life flighting you to Emory, I said for pneumonia?
He said I had something call a saddle bad pulmonary embili. Well the weather was too bad for the helicopter so the took me in a very fast ambulance. When I got there I was rushed to ICU.
They did more chest x-rays and monitored me, since it was late Friday night. On Monday I had a PET scan. This is where they inject you with radioactive glucose which runs through your veins. Well that narrowed it down to my liver, but they didn’t think that is where it started.
So on Tuesday I got a liver biopsy. This is where they use a CT machine to guide a big needle into you liver to draw out samples. Then when you go to recovery you have to lay on you left side for 2 hours and every breath feels like a knife being stuck in you back and the you flip and feel the knife on the other side for 2 hours.
At this point a group of doctors come in and they tell you they ran smears and test and if any of them lit up it is cancer. I said, ”Let me guess, mine looked like a Christmas tree!” They laughed and said I had Stage 4 Small Bowel and Liver Cancer.
So they moved me to a regular room where I awaited on what they were going to, see there are only 5000 cases of small intestine cancer a year and they are in men over 55, I am 33.
Well after 2 weeks of sitting there something finally happed. Everything I ate started coming back up. So I put my self on a liquid diet and the scheduled an endoscopy for the next day. Now this is fun. The put you half to sleep, prop you mouth open and stick this long tube with a camera and probe down your throat. They got down there just past my stomach and found a tumor. So they took a biopsy. I had an orange sized tumor blocking my small intestine.
I was scheduled for surgery 2 days later. Everything went well and recovery was fine with help from morphine. Surgery was on Wednesday and I had a few visitors, but on Saturday something bad happened. Something I have never expected. I started burping this weird taste and then all of the sudden I vomited a bucket full on stomach bile. My mother was running out of the room so fast. Even some of the nurses couldn’t handle it.
Now if you have never seen stomach vile and I hope you don’t. It is black as tar and makes road kill smell like the best perfume in the world. I had had the stuff pouring out my mouth and my nose, it was bad.
I had to have a port put in my chest so they could administer chemo easier, didn’t even feel that.
They started me off on some pretty hard chemo (which I guess it is all hard) I was going every 3 weeks, the taking 8 pills a day (horse pills) 4 in the morning and 4 at night and then got a week off. The weird thing about the chemo was for the first 10 days of so after chemo you couldn’t touch or drink anything cold. You couldn’t stick your hand in the fridge or freezer with out gloves on or it felt like be stabbed. I was terrible, imagine going all summer not being able to drink cold sweet tea, torture.
Then something starting up with my bile duct, I don’t know if it was that chemo was to strong or what. So now I had to have a procedure called an ERCP. This is where they go down through your throat and put stints in to stretch the ducts. Well the first one didn’t work, go they tried a metal one, it didn’t work.
The next step was to insert biliary tubes. This is where they stick a 2 foot long blue tube with holes in it that will drain the bile from you liver and small intestines in to bags that you get to carry around. This is not a fun procedure at lease it wasn’t for me. They had to go right through on of my tumors, no amount of pain medication could stop that
You have to flush you tubes 3 times a day, no problem. But they also for get to tell you that they get clogged all the time making you go down there and sit in a waiting room to get it fixed, if it falls out, in which you are to go to the ER, where they do absolutely nothing for you.
Currently I have 3 tubes. I had my last chemo 2 weeks a go, I have vomited 11 out of 13 days due to who know why. I have the constant taste of Gatorade and Powerade in my mouth.
There are a few people out there who know who I am because I live in a small town, and I ask you out of the respect and courtesy of my family you don’t mention ANYONES! name. I will not hesitate to have this thread deleted.
I wanted to write this so that if there is anyone out there with cancer, I kinda know what you are going through, they are all different. If you have had cancer, do you have any hints or suggestions?
And just to let you know what cancer can do to, I am 6’3” (at one time 270, slimed down to 250) now I weight 175 lbs, have no muscles, not even enough to play with my son on the floor. Also for the fear he will pull out one of my tubes, so everyday gets harder and harder.
Please pray for me my wife and my 9 month old son. Thanks
GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!
The one thing I left out of the original post was how awesome my wife has been. She is literally raising 2 children at once. She does everything. Down to my pills to flushing my tubes everyday.
I had a Dr.s appointment yesterday and got some bad news. I have an obstruction in my small intestine. I had an idea of this but never said anything. I had 3 choices. Have an endoscopy with biopsy, if it is cancer there was nothing they could do, if it was scare tissue they wanted to suck all the bile out of my stomach for 3 days and and i couldn't eat or drink for 3 days (torture), so I chose hospice. I have ended treatments and start hospice this week.
GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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