....When I lived on the east coast I’d sit there for hours reading Field and Stream, Outdoor Life, and other hunting pubs fascinated by the articles on elk hunting; complete with how to pursue them in RUT, track them in snow, and even recipes on how to prepare them for the plate. I’d stare at the photographs of breathtaking scenery, the string of pack mules, hard sided tents, and monster racks; then remember I was unemployed, a total loser, and casually flip the page knowing… ‘I’d never be able to afford going on an elk hunt’
?
…Now here I am in Montana, I’m a resident, its hunting season, I have a tag, and I still can’t afford to go on an elk hunt, but am anyways; so wish me luck!?...
……………………..
I did very little research I must admit, so this might be a bust; convinced it would never really happen and instead simply pointed my truck in the direction of public ground. Oh sure I’ve got a bull elk tag for the area and have booked a small cabin for the duration of ‘Opening-Weekend’ (Oct 25th*), but so has everyone else in the state, or so it appears?
(*Big-game seasons start on Sundays up here, odd as that seems?)
This is ‘public-land hunting’ and nothing more or less; ‘The Gravelly Region’, just west of West Yellowstone, begins mere feet behind the cabin and heads due west into Idaho. The hunters of Montana; ‘locals’, non residents, and the grizzly bears, will apparently be my ‘partners’ for the next week or so I’m told, though there’s not likely a one of them ‘who will be essentially unemployed and homeless following their trip’, nor knowing so while doing it; which adds a bit of adventure I really could do without?
…Yup, the job at the Big Horn Fly Shop is over, I’m about busted once again, and though I have no home to speak of; I intend on killing me a bull elk and a monster mule deer, before I even try to find a new place to live…. ‘How’s that for stupid???’
Bird-guiding fell thru this year because Suzie was attacked and injured by a Chow/Lab mix 24 hours before the Opener (long story) and the resulting hospitalization/care/ and Vet bills forced me to cancel what few days I’d had scheduled. She’s doing fine now and has a scar on her pretty pink little nose, but it hasn’t affected her bird finding skills as she proved that yesterday on the way up here*! Still, the scare was enough to convince me risking ripping her face open again or being shot by a novice hunter, wasn’t worth the toll; so I’ve shelved ‘guiding’ this year and will pursue other employment (?).
*Girls are ‘in boarding’ just south of Bozeman.
My stuff remains in my singlewide back on the REZ, but only till November 1st, then I’ve gotta be out; as the ‘tin can’ will be winterized, the pipes filled with free-on, windows wrapped in plastic, to sit empty under several feet of snow until another total loser rolls into Fort Smith on fumes, pries open its wooden door, and attempts to carve out a place for himself as the village idiot in a fishing village filled with idiots.
……………………...
I have my trusty rifle, a Marlin 270 with a scope that has no name. I bought a sling, bipod, and enough ammo to kill all the Taliban if they should happen to be seen in BLM area 327. All this for whopping $380.00 cash and sighted it in the same day just outside of town.
(Same I used to take my Big Horn Pronghorn last week, will post pics shortly)
I’d used to own a Remington model 700 in 30-06, and I’d paid over $400.00 just for the gun. Then I added a well advertised Leopold scope for another $390.00 and had myself a pretty expensive set-up; thanks to my ‘new credit card’ the woman just talked me into twenty minutes earlier at the entrance to Bass Pro Shops. With this gun I set about shooting at all sorts of game over the many years I owned it and missing nearly everything, to the point I sold it to a young fellow who’d showed interest; after I’d forgotten and left it on the roof of a Suburban as I toured he and his father around the property. It certainly wasn’t the Remington that was doing all the missing, but regardless; $200.00 bucks later the kid had a new (8 year old gun) and I had no rifle, and simply borrowed others when the time came to use one.
“A 30-06” I’d heard for years “was the best caliber for all sorts of big game” and would’ve been ideal for anything I might encounter in Montana, but they were out of this type in ‘06 at the local Trading Post; so I got the 270 and that was that.
(NOTE- My DEA friend from FL, who visited last year, ‘repossessed’ one I had for trip up?)
………………..
Besides the fella behind the counter, some old hobbled customer standing nearby on crutches, as well as a coworker at the fly shop -who’s supposedly felled many an elk, all assured me; “given the right kind of ammo a 270 would, could, and has killed, just as many elk as a 30-06”!
I feel better after hearing this even though the likelihood of me seeing an elk is low, but I hold out hope for some ‘beginner’s luck’, followed by a well placed shot? If I had any doubts though, I think I recall the famed trophy hunter Jack O’Conner favored this caliber for many a game including elk, so assuming I’m loaded with the right amount of powder (150 grain); I should have enough ‘knock down power’ to take a small new born elk calf should one make the mistake of showing itself within the next 36 hours
?
…Actually, I do intend to hunt for a bull elk, preferably one with at least 5x5 or better, as visions of such a beast have robbed me of sleep for the past 25 years. If one doesn’t show though in the first two days, I’ll take a cow or calf and go about attempting my first cleaning-and-quartering of it utilizing my packet of downloaded info (off the internet), and my handy new set of knives –supplying me with enough meat to get thru the winter and then some….?
…………………..
Oh yes, for those who are detecting a pattern, you’d be correct in deducing I’m spending hard-earned money I ‘should be saving for relocation’ instead on all the unnecessary calls, field cleaning knives, game bags, and pack-frame; none of which I’m likely to need considering my chances at elk are as slim as single women in Montana? The weight of all this combined with my hefty new gun, my not-so spectacular physique, and a few pounds of guilt, are a concern I might not even make it a hundred yards from my truck before giving in to exhaustion?
My local obit would hopefully read: ‘Died doing what he loved’, though if any real news organization got hold of it might coldly print a headline: …‘Idiotic elk hunter-wannabe found dead eleven feet from his truck after shooting monster elk, antlers and cape in his grasp, but no meat found nearby?!”
…………………………….
I was wise not to follow any of the “aerobic exercises” often listed in the same outdoor magazines -complete with illustrations of much thinner men than I doing all sorts of pushups, sit-ups, and other odd calisthenics; as the cartoonish guy prepared to go on his first elk hunt, (though he likely having more success than I will)?
Instead I spent any time I could’ve walked a mile, or even two blocks to the fly shop, behind the wheel of my truck; digging up my lawn doing a 3-point-turn, much to the entertainment and ridicule from my neighbors for being ‘so bloody lazy’.
…Admittedly the longest distance I’ve covered all year on-foot was the 1.3 miles slogged to-and-from a fishing-access, where I was ‘skunked on the Big Horn’ once again, then raced back to the shop for my noon-to-five shift where it was my job to advise a hundred visiting fishermen on “what’s working out there?”
Besides not having a girlfriend, which I think I’ve exhaustedly covered on the forum, I also have no friends who were willing to go elk hunting with me? My old hunting buddy from Florida decided to go off and join the Black Water circus in Afghanistan as a soldier of fortune (Xe/DEA)-hunting terrorist, instead of coming up for another Montana hunt with his old pal, so I’m going it alone.
...Because of this, I’ve decided to ask a few online friends to join me….. If your game????
…………………….
I’m settled into a tiny cabin on the Madison looking over a map of different shades of green and brown, indicating elevations in terrain, and marking off areas I have no intention to climb. If I see an elk track I’ll consider it a success, fresh droppings -bonus. If a nice mule deer or exceptionally handsome whitetail shows itself I intend to shorten ‘my first elk hunt’ with whatever’s easiest to get back to the truck without dying in the process. If a black bear should make the mistake of being in the same time-zone as me; I’ll attempt to lay down enough ammo to take my first bear too- given I applied for a tag for him as well. I’ll admit the wolf tag is the biggest stretch, but I’ll do my part if I see one as the state only allows three more till its’ controversial season is closed. The only animal I don’t have permission to kill are a Grizzly*, but legal or not; if one sizes me up for a meal I’ll shoot him in the eyeball with my new 270 and run for the hills
!
*Actually quite common in the Gravelly Mt. or so I hear?……………………..
Internet service is spotty to non-existent out here, but I’m heading to West Yellowstone one night and Ennis the other, both less than 30 miles in either direction, as I intend on doing a cursory job-search while here; given I’ve joined the ranks of those ‘collecting unemployment’ as of yesterday and need to show “I’m looking”. Thankfully, there’s no space on the page or requirement to mention ‘what you’re doing when you’re not looking’?
So I’ll check in nightly and let you know how things went, maybe post a few pics. If there’s a day’s delay between this post and the next, it means I’ve got one down and am busy cleaning it, or have been eaten by a grizzly, or got one down, was busy cleaning it, then was eaten by a grizzly; otherwise I intend to check-in.
The pressure is on now huh?!.....ah…”elk hunting”….who would do it any other way??..........
Moe
?…Now here I am in Montana, I’m a resident, its hunting season, I have a tag, and I still can’t afford to go on an elk hunt, but am anyways; so wish me luck!?...
……………………..
I did very little research I must admit, so this might be a bust; convinced it would never really happen and instead simply pointed my truck in the direction of public ground. Oh sure I’ve got a bull elk tag for the area and have booked a small cabin for the duration of ‘Opening-Weekend’ (Oct 25th*), but so has everyone else in the state, or so it appears?
(*Big-game seasons start on Sundays up here, odd as that seems?)
This is ‘public-land hunting’ and nothing more or less; ‘The Gravelly Region’, just west of West Yellowstone, begins mere feet behind the cabin and heads due west into Idaho. The hunters of Montana; ‘locals’, non residents, and the grizzly bears, will apparently be my ‘partners’ for the next week or so I’m told, though there’s not likely a one of them ‘who will be essentially unemployed and homeless following their trip’, nor knowing so while doing it; which adds a bit of adventure I really could do without
?…Yup, the job at the Big Horn Fly Shop is over, I’m about busted once again, and though I have no home to speak of; I intend on killing me a bull elk and a monster mule deer, before I even try to find a new place to live…. ‘How’s that for stupid???’
Bird-guiding fell thru this year because Suzie was attacked and injured by a Chow/Lab mix 24 hours before the Opener (long story) and the resulting hospitalization/care/ and Vet bills forced me to cancel what few days I’d had scheduled. She’s doing fine now and has a scar on her pretty pink little nose, but it hasn’t affected her bird finding skills as she proved that yesterday on the way up here*! Still, the scare was enough to convince me risking ripping her face open again or being shot by a novice hunter, wasn’t worth the toll; so I’ve shelved ‘guiding’ this year and will pursue other employment (?).
*Girls are ‘in boarding’ just south of Bozeman.
My stuff remains in my singlewide back on the REZ, but only till November 1st, then I’ve gotta be out; as the ‘tin can’ will be winterized, the pipes filled with free-on, windows wrapped in plastic, to sit empty under several feet of snow until another total loser rolls into Fort Smith on fumes, pries open its wooden door, and attempts to carve out a place for himself as the village idiot in a fishing village filled with idiots.
……………………...
I have my trusty rifle, a Marlin 270 with a scope that has no name. I bought a sling, bipod, and enough ammo to kill all the Taliban if they should happen to be seen in BLM area 327. All this for whopping $380.00 cash and sighted it in the same day just outside of town.
(Same I used to take my Big Horn Pronghorn last week, will post pics shortly)
I’d used to own a Remington model 700 in 30-06, and I’d paid over $400.00 just for the gun. Then I added a well advertised Leopold scope for another $390.00 and had myself a pretty expensive set-up; thanks to my ‘new credit card’ the woman just talked me into twenty minutes earlier at the entrance to Bass Pro Shops. With this gun I set about shooting at all sorts of game over the many years I owned it and missing nearly everything, to the point I sold it to a young fellow who’d showed interest; after I’d forgotten and left it on the roof of a Suburban as I toured he and his father around the property. It certainly wasn’t the Remington that was doing all the missing, but regardless; $200.00 bucks later the kid had a new (8 year old gun) and I had no rifle, and simply borrowed others when the time came to use one.
“A 30-06” I’d heard for years “was the best caliber for all sorts of big game” and would’ve been ideal for anything I might encounter in Montana, but they were out of this type in ‘06 at the local Trading Post; so I got the 270 and that was that.
(NOTE- My DEA friend from FL, who visited last year, ‘repossessed’ one I had for trip up?)
………………..
Besides the fella behind the counter, some old hobbled customer standing nearby on crutches, as well as a coworker at the fly shop -who’s supposedly felled many an elk, all assured me; “given the right kind of ammo a 270 would, could, and has killed, just as many elk as a 30-06”!
I feel better after hearing this even though the likelihood of me seeing an elk is low, but I hold out hope for some ‘beginner’s luck’, followed by a well placed shot? If I had any doubts though, I think I recall the famed trophy hunter Jack O’Conner favored this caliber for many a game including elk, so assuming I’m loaded with the right amount of powder (150 grain); I should have enough ‘knock down power’ to take a small new born elk calf should one make the mistake of showing itself within the next 36 hours
?…Actually, I do intend to hunt for a bull elk, preferably one with at least 5x5 or better, as visions of such a beast have robbed me of sleep for the past 25 years. If one doesn’t show though in the first two days, I’ll take a cow or calf and go about attempting my first cleaning-and-quartering of it utilizing my packet of downloaded info (off the internet), and my handy new set of knives –supplying me with enough meat to get thru the winter and then some….?
…………………..
Oh yes, for those who are detecting a pattern, you’d be correct in deducing I’m spending hard-earned money I ‘should be saving for relocation’ instead on all the unnecessary calls, field cleaning knives, game bags, and pack-frame; none of which I’m likely to need considering my chances at elk are as slim as single women in Montana? The weight of all this combined with my hefty new gun, my not-so spectacular physique, and a few pounds of guilt, are a concern I might not even make it a hundred yards from my truck before giving in to exhaustion?
My local obit would hopefully read: ‘Died doing what he loved’, though if any real news organization got hold of it might coldly print a headline: …‘Idiotic elk hunter-wannabe found dead eleven feet from his truck after shooting monster elk, antlers and cape in his grasp, but no meat found nearby?!”
…………………………….
I was wise not to follow any of the “aerobic exercises” often listed in the same outdoor magazines -complete with illustrations of much thinner men than I doing all sorts of pushups, sit-ups, and other odd calisthenics; as the cartoonish guy prepared to go on his first elk hunt, (though he likely having more success than I will)?
Instead I spent any time I could’ve walked a mile, or even two blocks to the fly shop, behind the wheel of my truck; digging up my lawn doing a 3-point-turn, much to the entertainment and ridicule from my neighbors for being ‘so bloody lazy’.
…Admittedly the longest distance I’ve covered all year on-foot was the 1.3 miles slogged to-and-from a fishing-access, where I was ‘skunked on the Big Horn’ once again, then raced back to the shop for my noon-to-five shift where it was my job to advise a hundred visiting fishermen on “what’s working out there?”
Besides not having a girlfriend, which I think I’ve exhaustedly covered on the forum, I also have no friends who were willing to go elk hunting with me? My old hunting buddy from Florida decided to go off and join the Black Water circus in Afghanistan as a soldier of fortune (Xe/DEA)-hunting terrorist, instead of coming up for another Montana hunt with his old pal, so I’m going it alone.
...Because of this, I’ve decided to ask a few online friends to join me….. If your game
???? …………………….
I’m settled into a tiny cabin on the Madison looking over a map of different shades of green and brown, indicating elevations in terrain, and marking off areas I have no intention to climb. If I see an elk track I’ll consider it a success, fresh droppings -bonus. If a nice mule deer or exceptionally handsome whitetail shows itself I intend to shorten ‘my first elk hunt’ with whatever’s easiest to get back to the truck without dying in the process. If a black bear should make the mistake of being in the same time-zone as me; I’ll attempt to lay down enough ammo to take my first bear too- given I applied for a tag for him as well. I’ll admit the wolf tag is the biggest stretch, but I’ll do my part if I see one as the state only allows three more till its’ controversial season is closed. The only animal I don’t have permission to kill are a Grizzly*, but legal or not; if one sizes me up for a meal I’ll shoot him in the eyeball with my new 270 and run for the hills
!*Actually quite common in the Gravelly Mt. or so I hear?……………………..
Internet service is spotty to non-existent out here, but I’m heading to West Yellowstone one night and Ennis the other, both less than 30 miles in either direction, as I intend on doing a cursory job-search while here; given I’ve joined the ranks of those ‘collecting unemployment’ as of yesterday and need to show “I’m looking”. Thankfully, there’s no space on the page or requirement to mention ‘what you’re doing when you’re not looking’?
So I’ll check in nightly and let you know how things went, maybe post a few pics. If there’s a day’s delay between this post and the next, it means I’ve got one down and am busy cleaning it, or have been eaten by a grizzly, or got one down, was busy cleaning it, then was eaten by a grizzly; otherwise I intend to check-in.
The pressure is on now huh?!.....ah…”elk hunting”….who would do it any other way??..........
Moe
!?
?!
?!
